Hobbies like reading , gardening , and video games can distract you while improving your mood and relieving negative feelings, so make sure to create time for yourself in your daily life. People sometimes confuse healthy anger and frustration with hatred. You and your partner consistently disagree on where you should settle down. They want to return to their hometown, while you want to explore a new big city.
To resolve this situation, all parties directly involved should have a chance to express their feelings. Then, work together to find a solution that works for everyone. If you feel as if others have singled you out or treated you unfairly, bring this up. It may not have been intentional.
Letting people know how they made you feel can reduce the chances of it happening again. Negative self-talk and feelings of self-loathing often contribute to the belief that everyone else hates you too. Do you often talk down to yourself? It can also eventually contribute to depression , anxiety , and other emotional distress. Learn how to swap self-hatred with self-love.
Many people who experience paranoia , for example, believe others hate them and have a plan to hurt them or ruin their lives. Paranoia can happen on its own, but it can also happen as a symptom of mental health conditions, including:. Social anxiety also involves extreme sensitivity to the reactions of others. A casual glance might seem like a glare, an honest evaluation like negative criticism.
And if no one seems interested in talking to you? Well, you might conclude they all hate you. A therapist can offer unbiased, compassionate guidance and help you explore these feelings. Our guide to affordable therapy can help you get started. If you feel neglected or ignored, it never hurts to start a conversation and share your feelings. Crystal Raypole has previously worked as a writer and editor for GoodTherapy. While this is a common feeling for people experiencing new places or life changes for the first time, it's a feeling that can rear its ugly head no matter where you are in life.
Seeing your friends on social media can definitely elicit feelings of being left out , and so can hearing about a social event that you weren't invited to. It should be comforting that nearly everyone, at one time or another, has felt this way.
Let's take a look at some common negative thought patterns that can lead someone to believe that everyone dislikes them. All-or-Nothing Thinking. All-or-nothing thinking is common among people who struggle with depression or anxiety. It's when you find yourself dividing every thought into a clear black-or-white situation. For example, instead of realizing that someone caught a last-minute movie, you jump to the conclusion that they must have planned it out while choosing not to invite you.
Look for patterns of thinking where you find yourself mentally using words like "never," "ever," or "always. When you catastrophize , you take every small action and turn it into, you guessed it, a catastrophe. So if you're worried about everyone hating you, this type of thinking would take something small, like the time you forgot a friend's birthday, and turn it into a concern that everyone thinks of you as inconsiderate and have collectively chosen to omit you from outings in the future.
This distortion is particularly relevant to the concern of everyone hating you because it makes every situation personal hence why it's called personalization. In reality, your friend might not have called when they said they would because of a family emergency that had nothing to do with you or anything you said or did. Mental Filters. This is when you overlook good things and choose to focus on one bad thing. So instead of remembering the good times with a friend, you keep recalling something that you regret from the past, even despite evidence that this doesn't matter to your friend.
Getting past these cognitive distortions takes practice, but once you've recognized that you fall into certain areas of thinking, you can start to address them. When these thoughts start to bubble up, try to recognize any immediate factors that may be contributing to this line of thinking, like self-isolating or generally not keeping up with your typical routine. That said, when these thoughts do pop up, Chlipala says it's time to practice playing your own devil's advocate.
Is this true? Is there something going on? It's also important to remember that people often don't notice the tiny details that you may be getting hung up on. If you're worried that you said something stupid at a party and that's why people aren't inviting you, remember that most people are truly aren't thinking about it.
Chlipala notes that it's important that people recognize these negative thoughts so that they don't become a common mental pattern that your brain turns to when certain issues arise. They found that everyone was more liked and valued by their peers than they thought they were.
They also found that everyone was more focused on what they said or did during an interaction than they were with others. Rest assured, everyone absolutely doesn't hate you.
While it's true that more people may have a heightened emotional response right now to stressors and irritants that might not have normally registered as triggering to them, what's likely happening is that you're internalizing that you're object of their irritation.
One reason to explain this is that we're not communicating in person as much anymore, and as a result, we have way fewer signals to lean on to confirm that our relationships are in tact and all is well.
Think about all the things that are lost when you can't see someone IRL: little pats on the bat, the ability to hug it out, micro gestures that denote playfulness. Without those things, we have this social dead-air space that we fill with our worst assumptions. And because almost everyone is having a difficult time now, we might take their moods personally. Furthermore, plenty of personal insecurities may be piling up as a result of new problems arising that don't necessarily have great solutions.
So while comforting others or offering advice or thoughts may feel underwhelming, taking blame may just be a way for you to retain a lost sense of control by making these problems about you.
0コメント